In my November blog I talked about finding our purpose and how in our busy lives we don’t often stop to consider this. Hopefully, over the festive break you found time to take stock, reflect on your life, your wants and needs and then set yourself some goals. If you did, keep returning to those and reminding yourself of how you want your life to be. If you didn’t, you were probably like many others rushing around madly trying to get everything ready for Christmas, caught up in a whirl of family and social events and suddenly it’s 2nd January, then the second week of January – where did that ‘time off’ go? Don’t worry, it’s not too late, make time today and give yourself the best start to 2018.
In our lives today we are always busy and rushing into the next thing so taking time to stop allows our thoughts to flow. I was lucky enough to have a holiday at the beginning of December. When I go on holiday it can take me days to fully unwind, I always start by escaping into a good novel, I get immersed in it and then gradually start to tune back into myself and the world. Reading my book allows me to unplug then plug back in again in a different way. It seems to free up my brain and allow my thoughts to come and just flit around, for me, that’s the way new ideas develop and decisions get made.
As I was letting my thoughts flit around last month I was reflecting on the recent women leaders’ development session I’d run about balance. We talked about just how difficult it is, for most of us, to find the perfect balance in our busy lives with competing demands of work and family commitments. For many women, it feels like everyone wants a piece of us, we take on everything and we don’t often ask for help or say no. Sound familiar?
Unfortunately, there is no perfect balance for any of us – life is a plate spinning exercise. We try to keep all the plates in the air at the same time – sometimes just a couple and sometimes far too many. A big step forward for many of us is to realise there is never a perfect balance.
Balance is a very individual thing and it looks different for everyone. Your priorities in life are continually shifting and changing but if you’ve started to think about your purpose and what you want for your life it helps bring you back to what’s important. Stop and ask yourself whether there any of those plates that you can stop spinning for a while or even completely?
Sheryl Sandberg, the author of Lean In and COO of Facebook, talks in her book about the myth of women ‘Doing It All’ and asks the question ‘can we do it all?’ No, of course we can’t do everything. We must make choices, adjustments, compromises and we do this throughout our lives. To help she asks herself the question ‘Can I do what’s most important for me and my family?’ Asking yourself this is a great way to prioritise what’s important and helps you to focus on those things. We can aim for fulfilment and sustainability but not for perfection. The process starts with knowing what is most important to you and what your ambitions in life are (more on that next time).
What does the right balance in life look like for you right now? Taking a couple of hours each week to focus on the bigger picture in your work rather than putting out fires all day? Getting to the gym 3 times a week? What are the first steps you need to take?
Photo by Chris Montgomery on Unsplash